Sports and television go hand in like peanut butter and chocolate or boxing and Don King. They just work. In the end, we couldn’t have one without the other as baseball supplies TV channels with a good chunk of their sporting content and television revenues are the big push that teams use to pay their players gratuitous salaries. But if you’re a frequent TV watcher like me, you’ll note that outside of the TSN and Sportsnet broadcasts, the Jays don’t get anywhere near the kid of love that they should when it comes to the boob tube.

Sportsnet’s Behind the Jays documentary and their weekly Jays Connected show goes some of the way towards giving fans the kind of inside look at the Jays that they desire, but we need more. After the promotional brouhaha caused by Victoria “Posh Spice” Beckham and her reality TV special that was broadcast on NBC, it make take an excursion into the deep end of popular culture to really hammer home the Jays ideas. Even a former Blue Jay in the form of steroid-addled dude Jose Canseco has made it onto VH1, it can’t loose!

Yeah, that’s right. I’m proposing that we hire some publicists, take the team down to Los Angeles and come out with a whole new lineup of Toronto Blue Jays based reality TV. C’mon, you know you like the sound of that.

With a line of Toronto Blue Jays reality TV shows, we’re only one step away from a full cable channel and from there, world domination. If the Yankees can do it, then so can we, it may take a little help from the GlobeMedia/Bell/CTV monolith, but it can be done. We can even get the entire team and the veterans involved. Just think of the merchandise possibilities!

The Bachelor with Alex Rios

This one’s an easy one. Hot single boy seeks woman of his dreams on a nationally broadcast television show. Sports fans have already had a dose of this kind of thing over the last few years, but we’re going to switch it up a touch. Jesse Palmer of the NFL’s New York Giants was the pre-requisite slab of meat in the 2004 edition of The Bachelor. Tennis veteran Mark Philippoussis can be found on TV right now as the man that two competing groups of ladies are chasing. With the style and Latin flair of the 26-year old Jays outfielder added to the pot, you know the hearts will break and ratings will fly off the charts.

Bullpen Island

So, this one is pretty easy to wrap your head around. All twelve of the Blue Jays pitchers are locked in a giant recreation of the bullpen at Rogers field. Over the course of a three month period, they are voted out one by one with the eventually winner being voted King Of Bullpen Island. You’d think that Roy Halliday would do well being the veteran that he is, but I’d put my money on Dustin McGowan and Jeremy Accardo’s youthful guile being their keys to a possible victory.

Jays Idol

This could be the cause for some public humiliation but I think it could work. Each of the Jays has a specific tune that they like played when they come up to bat at Rogers Center. Instead of swinging the bat, lets have the lads a microphone and see what happens with that. I’m sure the younger lads could deliver some fine hip-hop for us while the rock fans on the roster could have the crowd eating out of the palm of their hands. Even if it doesn’t work, just remember, it can’t anywhere near as bad as Canadian Idol has been this season.


The Ricciardi’s/The Gibbons’

Now this one is a hard choice. The Osbourne’s have made family-focused reality TV show a mainstay since they plowed their way into the public consciousness a few years back. It makes sense then to take one of the most prominent father figures that the Jays has and take a look at him and his family. The trouble, I can’t decide between John Gibbons and J.P. Ricciardi. You know that Gibbons will provide, his frequent run-ins with various Jays players have made great TV in the past, so you know that he’ll be ready to spark a match and set light to any familial situation. Ricciardi on the other hand, seems like the eccentric kind of dad who embarrasses his kids frequently. TV would be just as good but a different twist on it entirely.

Thoughts on a postcard to the Jays Fans Forum!


The Surreal Life: Jays Veteran’s Edition

So you’ve all seen the Surreal Life by now. Eight b-list entertainers are left to entertain themselves in a house in the Hollywood hills for two weeks. In our version, we switch it up a little by taking some of the more un Jays veterans to ever play for the tea and put them in said house. I’m thinking a line up of Cito Gaston, Ernie Whitt, Roberto Alomar, George Bell, Tom Henke, Roger Clemens, Buck Martinez and Jesse Barfield. Some of these guys hate each other, some of these guys love each other and few have no other who the others are., so sparks are guaranteed to fly.

Two more ideas that have been proposed by may not fit the reality bill.

Jays E.R.

While E.R. is still on the air, we’re got to have A.J. Burnett and B.J. Ryan as guest stars. As the officially walking wounded for the Jays 2007 season, they’d be perfect to play car crash victims, guys with gun shot wounds or in a perfect replica of the way they’ve played this year, corpses. All we need is the return of George Clooney for some extra drama and you’ve got a perfect episode for sweeps week. Hell, maybe one of them can get in a fight with the Croatian doctor.

The Nathan’s Hot Dog’s Jays First Annual Jay’s Eating Contest

C’mon, you know Frank Thomas and Gustavo Chacin could go toe to toe at this one and do some serious damage. Matt Stairs and troy Glaus into the mix and you have the kind of displays of gratuitous over-eating that Takeru Kobayashi and Joey Chestnut could only dream of. Plus, you’d be surprised how well the ratings on competitive eating does, it’s not Nascar but it’ll certainly win over a demographic that can appreciate the metaphorical car-crash that is excess consumption of hot dogs, chicken wings, roasted pork buns and hamburgers.